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Intellectually Challenged

Sad But True

Police in Wichita, Kansas, arrested a 22-year-old man at an airport hotel after he tried to pass two (counterfeit) $16 bills.



A man in Johannesberg, South Africa, shot his 49-year-old friend in the face, seriously wounding him, while the two practiced shooting beer cans off each other's head.



A company trying to continue its five-year perfect safety record showed its workers a film aimed at encouraging the use of safety goggles on the job. According to Industrial Machinery News, the film's depiction of gory industrial accidents was so graphic that twenty-five workers suffered minor injuries in their rush to leave the screening room. Thirteen others fainted, and one man required seven stitches after he cut his head falling off a chair while watching the film.



The Chico, California, City Council enacted a ban on nuclear weapons, setting a $500 fine for anyone detonating one within city limits.



A bus carrying five passengers was hit by a car in St. Louis, but by the time police arrived on the scene, fourteen pedestrians had boarded the bus and had begun to complain of whiplash injuries and back pain.



Swedish business consultant Ulf af Trolle labored 13 years on a book about Swedish economic solutions. He took the 250-page manuscript to be copied, only to have it reduced to 50,000 strips of paper in seconds when a worker confused the copier with the shredder.



A convict broke out of jail in Washington D.C., then a few days later accompanied his girlfriend to her trial for robbery. At lunch, he went out for a sandwich. She needed to see him, and thus had him paged. Police officers recognized his name and arrested him as he returned to the courthouse in a car he had stolen over the lunch hour.



When two service station attendants in Ionia, Michigan, refused to hand over the cash to an intoxicated robber, the man threatened to call the police. They still refused, so the robber called the police and was arrested.



A Los Angeles man who later said he was "tired of walking," stole a steamroller and led police on a 5 mph chase until an officer stepped aboard and brought the vehicle to a stop.



A 36 year old man who had lost his memory asked police in Hamburg, Germany, to find out who he was. He wished he hadn't bothered when they discovered he was wanted for fraud and arrested him.



Stopped for speeding at 80 mph, Michelle Radin told police in Indiana that she had no oil in her car and was racing home as fast as possible before the engine blew up.



Police in Baton Rouge, Louisiana, charged Redmond McGee with breaking into a woman's house and brushing her hair against her will.



The owner of a house in Gilroy, California, found that a burglar had hung new curtains, made the bed, dumped the trash, done the dishes, stacked newspapers, put dirty clothes in a hamper and put away the ironing board. Nothing was taken except the old curtains, and the burglar left a note signed 'Prince Eddie', saying: "Dear Sir, Ihope you don't mind. I cleaned your house. Don't worry. I won't take anything because my father is a duke in Spain..." Police later arrested a mentally disturbed youth.



The victim of a car thief in Trevise, Italy, couldn't believe his luck when the car was returned with a full tank and a note apologizing for borrowing the car and offering dinner at a restaurant. Finding that a table for four had been booked in advance, the man took his whole family and their host even phoned to ask if they were enjoying the meal. When they returned home they found that their house had been cleared of its entire contents, including jewelry and $800 in savings.



Bank robber Anthony Colella was making a clean getaway with $1,300 he had grabbed during a New York hold-up when he was stopped by a passer-by who promptly mugged him. Deeply distressed, Colella went straight round to the police station to report the mugging-- and was arrested for the original robbery.



An unemployed US printer who turned to counterfeiting was caught because he used black ink instead of bright green on his phony bills. It turned out he was color-blind.



Pizza delivery man Troy Brewer was robbed of $50 by two men in Balch Springs, Texas. He was in a phone booth when two men came up to him, thrust a snapping turtle at his face and said: "Don't move or you're gonna get bit!"